I care but the business doesn't
"The problems we face as a society and as individuals are rarely due to a lack of empathy. Actually, they are often due to too much of it." Paul Bloom
I'm known as an empathetic leader - one who cares deeply about people and who supports them when they encounter challenges in their personal life. I operate off a set of priorities such as people first and family first which guide my actions and decisions. When one of my employees or teammates is ill, I'm concerned first with his or her wellbeing. When they have family issues, I want them to focus on those issues and not their role in the company. I believe this to be the best approach to leadership - loyalty, love, and empathy begets engaged, dedicated people. Unfortunately the business gets a vote and it, on the other hand, does not care.
That last sentence is a cold hard truth. If I'm down a teammate and it affects our performance as a company, customers may shop elsewhere. They don't care, nor should they, that I may not have the depth to handle the temporary loss of a teammate. If customers elect to shop elsewhere, the company as a whole suffers and when the company suffers the livelihoods of everyone on the team are in jeopardy. Here is how I approach it.
I don't stray from my priorities. I'll offer my deepest sympathy and empathy and I'll try to help an individual problem solve. I go the extra mile before I switch gears and talk about my obligations beyond them. I shift my empathy from the individual to the team and to the business. I do this all on a foundation of trust. Good employees understand. Those who do not are probably too selfish and self-centered to serve with me and the organization in the first place.
"Eric, I do really empathize with your situation and I want to help. What can be done to get you back on your feet performing at your peak?" -discussion and attempts to get them to solve their problem(s)- "Unfortunately, I'm out of options and resources. I must balance my empathy and attention to the business and its people. I care deeply but our customers do not therefore I must (let you go, stop paying you while you recover, ...)."
These are hard conversations which feel counter to the empathetic ways we desire to lead. That is why not everyone chooses to be a leader. It is also why some businesses thrive and others don't. Just keep in mind your obligations to the business and the greater team. Be a caring, empathetic leader but be tough enough to deal with the cold, hard reality of running a business. Good employees will understand. Those who do not, shouldn't be on the team.
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Make it Personal!
Rob
Rob Campbell