Your angst is healthy
"Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create." Roy T. Bennett
“Nervous (perspiring airline passenger)? Yes. First time (referring to flying)? No, I’ve been nervous lots of times.” I love this line from the 1980 disaster comedy film, Airplane. Here is the link to watch the clip. Everyone hates that nervous feeling they get when facing something challenging such as leadership. We yearn to grow out of it – to achieve a level of confidence which keeps our anxiety at bay. We seek order where life is easy and predictable. New flash: it will never happen. Not if one desires to lead and grow. I’ve said before, there exists no fully confident, and competent leader. We are all imperfect in some way, and our flaws, along with our inexperience, are typically what cause our angst.
In my U.S. Army leadership journey, I can recall countless periods of angst. Whether it was the buildup to a combat deployment, a significant training event, or a briefing to a senior commander, there was this pit in my stomach – an uneasy, even nauseous feeling which manifested in loss of appetite, sleeplessness, or lack of concentration. It was hard to overcome. I wasn’t alone. We soldiers got through it as best we could by living as healthy as we could – good exercise, diet, and the best sleep we could muster.
This blog, “your angst is healthy,” comes mostly from a period of time when I transitioned from a company grade officer – a tactical, first-line supervisor who could see and touch all he led, to a field grade officer, a senior VP – someone a level removed from the rank and file, who translated strategy into action across a greater span of control (the field). As a field grade I knew I would need to lead at a different level. There would be tremendous pressure on me, and I would have to manage numerous tasks under the close watch of a commander one rank above me who had probably done it better than I would. I was anxious, wondering if I was up to the task.
“Your angst is healthy,” I was told by a mentor when confessing my distress. He meant a few things when telling me this. First, it was a sign that I cared. Was I careless, the worry would not be there. Because I did care and wanted to do my best, I was anxious. Second, my angst would make me prepare harder. Of course, I knew preparation would help relieve my fears because I knew it would produce results and boost my confidence. Third, my angst would make me work harder. Dealing with my angst meant that I would have to fight it head on. Some sweat equity would be a nice counter to my nervousness.
Bill Eckstrom, TED speaker and founder of the Ecsell Institute would describe this angst as growth – the “complexity growth ring,” where we are challenged yet growing the way we should, to advance personally and professionally. I share his TED Talk often. Care, preparation, and hard work are anything but easy, but we all know what ‘easy’ delivers – not much in the way of growth and advancement.
Indeed, too much angst can be destructive. Do the hard work and preparation to counter it but know that it will never be defeated. All my greatest successes were followed by more periods of angst. Through my leadership experience I made friends with my angst. I did my best to manage it and I worked hard to gain knowledge and confidence as I matured. My angst proved to be (and continues to) a sign certainly of the challenge ahead but also a sign that I care. That’s leadership.
Make it Personal!
Rob
Rob Campbell